Grade School Saiyuki
by Michellin Quavers
Summary: Gensomaden Saiyuki goes to school! The setting has changed, but the fight's still the same! Chapter Four's here!
1. Chaptah Wan!

Disclaimer: I'm not the owner of Gensomaden Saiyuki, or any character attributed to it. Heck, I don't own anything of importance! Anyway, you could thank Mineruka Kazuya for bringing Saiyuki into the world.  
  
(Intro, please, "Still Time". Dareka ga sutete shimata.)  
  
In West Grade School, there was a ruthless principal named Gyokumen Koushu. She has in her employ the school's safety patrol, with Kougaiji as the leader, and Dokugakuji, Yaone and Kougaiji's younger sister, Ririn as the members.  
  
And what is their mission? To duke it out with four heroes of the campus. And who are the four heroes of the campus? They are Genjo Sanzo, an average, anti-social, brooding student, Cho Hakkai, the genius, kind student who's anger you do not want to draw out, Sha Gojyo, a little below the average student with innumerable crushes, and Son Goku, the drains-his- wallet-dry and, uh, "in jeopardy" student.  
  
And what is THEIR mission? To seek out the west corridor, where the dreaded Gyokumen's office resides, find out why she's bullying and extorting money from students, and report it to the police, or, if possible, stop her themselves.  
  
And who will look out for their hides? Unbeknownst to Sanzo, his aunt, Kanzeon Bosatsu, with her trusty butler, Jiroushin, is observing him, or helping him when the need is great. Now, on with the show!  
  
"Man, all this walking down corridors is making me hungry! Sanzo, please buy me some fish balls!" Goku's voice echoed and trailed off. They were now in Building 2 3rd floor Section 10 Hallway 5 (now you know how incredibly hard it is to sort out where Gyokumen's office is.). A vein pulsated in Sanzo's temple as he grunted his usual answer. "You annoying stupid kid! Go ask from Gojyo!"  
  
Inside the Principal's office, Gyokumen summoned her safety patrol and said, "Well? How much money have you extorted from the students?" Kougaiji grunted, dumping the contents of a sack onto her desk. She surveyed and counted the money and said, "That is not enough. Kou, how many times am I going to explain? If you want me to pay for your momma's rent so you won't be evicted, then you have to earn me some money so I can bail my darling husband, Gyumao, from jail. You understand dear Kou? Or do I have to do everything?" Kou sighed and bent his head low. He would rather look at the floor than this hag's grinning face. "Yes, Ms. Koushu."  
  
Kou set out from the office along with his patrol members. They approached Building 2 and saw some students there. "Alright, people, we know what to do. Extortion time!" They approached the students; ready to bully them or whatever, when the four guys spotted them. "You!" Kou exclaimed, recognizing the four. "Yes, it's us, safety patroller," Genjo Sanzo said. Goku, spotting trouble, clapped his hands together and said, "Alright! A fight with the safety patrol! This's gonna be fun!" Gojyo sighed in relief. "Good thing, too, or he'll be pestering me for money all day." 


	2. Chaptah Twuoh!

Let's see where we ended. Ah, the face-off. We see our heroes about to do battle with West (yes, that IS the name of the school) Grade School's dreaded safety patrol. "You losers will be begging to surrender when we're through with you!" Ririn shouted with glee as each student prepared to fight. "Oh yeah, bratty girl?" yelled back Goku, "what if WE beat you? Almighty Licorice Stick!"  
  
Instantly, a long, red, cherry-flavored licorice stick materialized on Goku's outstretched hand. His "team mates" began summoning their weapons as well. Gojyo brandishes his metal yo-yo, Hakkai possesses the powerful water balloons, and Genjo Sanzo readies his exorcism pellet gun, while keeping the Holy Paper Airplanes, his ace-in-the-hole on hold for great need.  
  
But the enemies are not to be undone. Ririn can punch the hardiest school bully to smithereens, Yaone has her flour bombs, Dokugakuji, too, has a metal yo-yo, and Kougaiji, though good in fighting like all of them, has the added power to summon weevils. "Now, Sanzo, let's see if we are evenly matched, or if I prove to be the better!" Kou calls out in confidence. And with that battle cry, they strike!  
  
We have got but a glimpse of Gyokumen's true intentions. But what would she really do with the money? Surely not to bail him out, he's stuck without bail in jail. No, she needs the money to pay two of the most cunning criminal minds that ever lived (in their world at least) to BUST darling Gyumao out. Their names are Ni and Fan. Both cunning, both good at what they do (mainly scheming and conniving), it'll come as a surprise that they DO NOT GET ALONG! No, absolutely no hope of them becoming friends. So, what are they doing right now? Well, they were sent to infiltrate the jailhouse complex so they can get the info they need to bust him out.  
  
"Ni! You slime ball doppelganger! Your footsteps can be heard from here to Kentucky!" Fan hissed at Ni. He sighed and replied, "Fan, Fan, Fan. When are you going to realize that I am a man of quality?" Fan cursed under her breath as she continued spying and gathering data, while Ni took images and audio.  
  
After frustratingly fumbling with faulty equipment, she asked him, "Really, Ni, why do we have to do all this? I mean, we're here already, why don't we just do what we were paid to do?" Ni took out his toy bunny and said, "Well, we need all the data for a perfect getaway. One slip, and we'll be sharing a cell with our client." Fan knew he was right, so she silently returned to tinkering with the tools, trying hard not to let Ni relish the thought that she doesn't know what she was doing. Though, unfortunately, he already knows, with satisfaction.  
  
Let's go to Tenkai Subdivision, where the financially omnipotent dwell. Here, too, resides Aunt Kanzeon Bosatsu, and Jiroushin the butler. With her seat-of-the-pants technology she buys from all her money, she can observe cute little nephew Sanzo from a convenient distance. Putting down her hi- tech binoculars to sip some lemonade, she remarks, "The first fight has begun. Though both groups may match each other in physical prowess, it is yet to be seen whether one will best the other in wits." "Ah, Ms. Bosatsu," comments Jiroushin, "with you as his nephew, Sanzo will definitely inherit your wits." Kanzeon giggled softly at the statement, as she returns to observing the scuffle. 


	3. Chaptah Threee!

Saiyuki Gensomaden to related anything own not do I: Disclaimer: I do not own anything related to Gensomaden Saiyuki.  
  
A/N: Okay, I gotta put this aside first. The guys here aren't in their corresponding ages; they've all been turned into kids.  
  
SLAM! Goku was sent hurtling against the trash bin. "You're gonna pay for that, Kougaiji!" he said, "Let's see you relish the thought of bathing in garbage!" A nearby crack on the wall shone and weevils poured out and crawled towards him. "Let's see you try."  
  
BOOM! BOOM! Twin explosions erupted as Hakkai's water balloon and Yaone's flour bombs were sent whizzing to their targets and missed. And where did they land? Well, both misjudged the distance and fell short in the middle just as Sanzo was running towards Kougaiji. Try making something with a pale color even paler, and soggy. It wasn't a pretty sight. "Sorry, Sanzo!" Hakkai hollered apologetically (In K. Bosatsu's mansion, the enthusiastic aunt laughs at her nephew's, er, renewed façade). Sanzo, with a toothy frown fixed on his face, wiped away the flour-and-water mixture, took out his pellet gun and squirted out more paste that got inside. Then, he swiped a water balloon from Hakkai and poured its contents over him, and walked away, muttering, "For some reason I wish this particular fight would stop!"  
  
CLANG! Tiny sparks ensued as the metal yo-yos of Gojyo and Dokugakuji clashed against each other. "Heh, to think you're the son of the aunt of my little brother's cousin!" Gojyo said. Doku stopped and scratched his head and said, "Or was it the brother of my mother's sister's son's cousin?" Sanzo, already in a bad mood from his "bath", overheard their new argument and shouted irritatingly, "Oh, for the love of crap, Gojyo, you're just making a roundabout way of saying brother!" Gojyo hissed, "Can't you see we're in the middle of a fight here?" Sanzo drew his pistol and said, "Can't you see your life flashing by you? Because if you don't stop irritating me and settle this fight, you soon will be." Gojyo decides it would be very healthy for him to obey.  
  
Finally, after weaving through fights, Sanzo manages to reach Kougaiji, who just summoned a horde of weevils to attack Goku. He crept up to him and was about to point the gun to his head when Kou disappeared. "Where the heck did he go?" Sanzo said, seething. Suddenly, Kou's fist appeared out of nowhere.  
  
Back to Ni and Fan. Ni was watching the guard who was monitoring the cameras placed all over the jailhouse. Ni secretly put some tranquilizer medications into the coffee and in minutes, the guy was sleeping like a baby. Fan shoved the snoring guard from the easy chair and began tampering with the monitors. A few quick adjustments and she could see the building, floor and cell where Mr. Gyumao was incarcerated, every inch of it. Then, they immediately headed for the cell.  
  
They silently crept to the place. Not even Ni was throwing gibes at Fan. Then, Fan stepped on a part of the concrete floor that creaked. A creaking concrete floor? "Ni, hand me any lever there," she said. "Yes, my dear," he said. Ah well, she knew the silence was too good to be true. She searched the floor until she found a thin, square cleave around the creaking part of the floor. She used the lever to pry it open, and it turned out to be a secret door to, well, a secret underground tunnel.  
  
"Duh, what're you doin' der?" a very dumb sounding voice said. The two looked up and saw that Gyumao's cell was adjacent to their location. "Erm, Mr. Gyumao, sir!" Fan mumbled surprised that they didn't even know they were already there. "Hmm, Fan, maybe we could do the job now after all!" Ni said. So, after picking the cell lock, they had Gyumao out of there and started to go down the tunnel. But not before making sure that the trap door was secure.  
  
Creeping through the strangely ventilated tunnel, they were already going a long way when Gyumao said, "Duh, where're we goin'?" Fan said, "Why, Mr. Gyumao, we're going away! As soon as we're outside, you're a free man." Then, she stopped short, and slapped her forehead. How dumb! They didn't even ask themselves where this tunnel ends! Ah, well, they'll find out soon enough.  
  
Goku can't believe his eyes. Sure, he may be quite, erm, intellectually challenged (Sorry, Goku lovers), but this is way, way, way overboard. Kou just grabbed Sanzo by the school uniform collar and twirled him around like some kind of dumbbell! Gojyo and Doku were fighting, not with their yo-yos, but were arguing instead on what kind of relative they were! Hakkai and Yaone were just tossing one water balloon to each other as if playing catch to see which one will drop if first, and Ririn, wait one minute, where's Ririn?  
  
"Gooooookuuuuu! Goku, Goku, Goku, Goku!" Ririn shouted, running down the wall and after him. He was anchoring himself to the Licorice Stick, bracing for impact, when suddenly Ririn caught him in a bear hug. "Kou says we're enemies but no! I don't believe it! I liiiikeee you!" "Ahh!" Goku said, tugging himself away from this crazy girl. "Hey, come back you mischievous saru!" she squealed in delight, running after him. She manages to grab his foot, as he squirms like mad. Somehow, everything doesn't make sense. "What in the name of my favorite dumpling store is happening here?" he yelled. 


	4. Chaptah Foh!

Disclaimer: I don't own Gensomaden Saiyuki and all related characters.  
  
Gyokumen was growing impatient. "Why, if I get my hands on that useless brat!" she said, while recounting the extorted money from a safe. Tsk, a few bills short! "That's the last straw!" she screeched, smoothing the crease of her skirt and striding out of the office to look for Kougaiji.  
  
Kanzeon was laughing derisively as, with the help of her binoculars, Gyokumen tripped on her high heels on the way to the commotion. "Serves that slut right!" she said, placing the binoculars inside its box. "Tired, Ms. Bosatsu?" Jiroushin asked. She shook her head and laughed some more. "I'm itching for action, my dear Jiroushin. That sluttish Gyokumen is looking the part of an irresistibly scratching post!" The butler sighs as he followed Ms. Bosatsu to the garage, where she owns one of the slowest cars in Tenkai Subdivision, which is of course the fastest in the rest of the world.  
  
He heaves open the garage door, which was made of thick concrete. Kanzeon sighs and says, "Ah, Jiroushin, remind me to fix the remote on this garage door. That looks like the weight of our neighbor, Mr. Litouten's, ego." Jiroushin, after some more heaves, wiped off the sweat from his forehead and replied, "Well said, Ms. Bosatsu." She climbed aboard the driver's seat while he strapped on his seatbelt, very, very securely, beside her. She switches on the ignition, releases the brake, and shouts, "Hang on! I might get enthusiastic here!" before flooring the gas pedal. Many a head from Tenkai looked out their doors, heads shaking, as Kanzeon's tires screeched all along the way.  
  
Time seemed to freeze for Sanzo as he was hurled way, way up to the corridor's ceiling by Kou. How the heck did he do that? He landed with an unpleasant thud on top of Hakkai. From a distance, Kou was drawing closer and growing bigger, which is what the laws of physics or whatever will allow, except that he really was growing. His red hair was growing longer, and, what's happening to his school uniform? The khaki pants and white shirt slowly turned into a black, leather jacket with a white scarf attacked to it and off-white pants with black shoes to match. Sanzo rubbed his eyes; even Kou's appearance was changing. His ears grew pointy and his fingernails became claw-like. He wore triangular earrings on both ears, and he also has bracelets. In a mere minute, the once kid leader of the ruthless school safety patrol has turned into a middle-aged demon something!  
  
Kou stopped right in front of him and, with a startled look pointed a finger at him, saying, "What's happening to you?" "What do you mean you demon changeling!" Sanzo looked at his own clothes and he, too, was changing just like Kou. He was definitely growing taller, and, eww, what's with his clothes? His uniform is turning into a sort of monk's frock! He had this gold rectangular thing on his chest, and his paper airplanes were molding into one long strip of paper with weird writings on it. His pistol turned into a true-blue Smith and Wesson revolver with the yin-yang symbol on it, and under the white frock is a black turtleneck with black warmer things on his arms. Well, despite the weird priestly look, he still had his gun. He cocked the gun at Kou, saying, "I don't know what's up with me. Any objections?"  
  
Something moved from under him, and he realized he had landed on Hakkai a while ago. He, too, turned into a grown man with a different set of clothes. "I don't know what's happening here, but, would you please move aside?" he said hurriedly. Instinctively, Sanzo complied and out of Hakkai's hand a blast of energy ensued, ripping off a chunk of the ceiling, where Sanzo once stood. Something caught Sanzo's eye, and he quickly stepped aside. A crescent blade attached to a chain sliced bast the place where he once stood. Gojyo rubbed the back of his neck. "How do you work this thing?" he said, holding up a metal staff where the chain was connected.  
  
Goku can't believe it. Weirdness times ten! Everyone, even he has turned into adults with weird powers. He looked at the Licorice Staff and saw that it transformed into a red staff with golden knobs at the end. "At least Ririn hasn't spotted me yet," he said. Spoke too soon, for Ririn popped out of nowhere and ran towards him. "Why does this keep happening again!" he yelled, and quickly stepped aside. Ririn couldn't compensate, and rocketed into the wall, blowing a big hole into it. "Wow, I could punch pretty well, but I never knew I was this strong!" she said, delighted, though she probably didn't notice the strange changes that's happening to everyone. She punched the wall one more time and an small tremor ensued before it collapsed into dust. Goku groaned.  
  
"HA! I FINALLY GOT HERE!" Gyokumen and Kanzeon shouted triumphantly when at last they, well, got there. And what greeted them was, well, total chaos. Kanzeon looked beside her and found Gyokumen staring back at her. "You!" she screeched. "You, too!" Gyokumen replied, about to fold up her uniform's sleeves, only to realize they turned into loose, kimono-like ones. Her ears were pointy, and, what in the name of her Gyumao-darling is that witch woman with the sluttish attire (hey, don't blame me, I think Kanzeon's dress is a bit, erm, showy.)? "Well, I'm going to pretend that you even have clothes on, and get on with our little fight!" Gyokumen said, arms folded. "What? You think I'm the slut here? Look at you!" Kanzeon snarled. You could just imagine Jiroushin in referee attire holding up a placard saying "Catfight".  
  
"I can't take it anymore!" Goku yelled, kicking himself free from Ririn's grip. He tried to punch her, but his fist landed on the floor and made a small crater on the concrete. His head was throbbing, and the room was spinning. Now that Gyokumen and Kanzeon are thrown in the chaotic mix, it just made his head ache more. Great, now I'm seeing a beggar in brown rags, he thought, I'm really, really, confused now. Just when he thought his brain will explode, Gojyo's face appeared. "Oy, bakasaru! Wake up, you're having nightmares!" "Oww, my head! It feels like it's gonna explode!" Goku said. Sanzo came minutes later and said, "You sleep-walking stupid monkey! While you were dreaming, you sleepwalked and almost fell off that rock ledge over there. Good thing Hakkai spotted you and stopped your mindless wandering!"  
  
Dr. Ni told the shadowy figure behind him, "Well, the machine works." The stranger replied, "But it's not enough to kill Goku. I thought invading a simpleton's mind will be enough to kill him, but I see that you forgot some external factors. Oh, well, we proceed with the plan." Dr. Ni nodded. "Yes, the plan. We'll have the world in our hands, I take it?"  
  
The End 


End file.
